@jlock17: I hate when all the silverware is dirty and I'm down to using the giant decorative fork that hangs on the wall.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@squirrel74wkgn: [dinner w/friends] "How long you two been married?" It's been thirt- (wife shaking head) teenish twenty- (still shaking) for a long time.
@causticbob: Greek people must feel like a tampon. They live in one of the most beautiful places in the world, but at the worst period.
@ericsshadow: Doctor: How long have you been in pain? Women: It started at 7:45am on Monday while I was at work Men: Sometime between yesterday and 1997
@randomnloveit: If people are going to judge me they should at least hold up scorecards so I know how I'm doing.