@TheDailySchmuck: I hate when I shape my hand like a phone to tell someone to call me, but they're in their 20s and don't know what phones used to look like.
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@briangaar: Sometimes I'm playing a dangerous game like Halo & people ask if I get scared but honestly no, your training just takes over
@skinnyfrittata: A kid asked me how babies are made so I panicked and said “3D printers” because no one has ever explained it to me either
@MrSandeepP: Truthful Tuesday: If a rapper raps about how much money he has then I download his music for free.