@2tonbug: I hate when I'm in a restaurant bathroom, and I run out of toilet paper. Like my dinner guests are gonna be scared of HALF a mummy costume
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@bestlizard: A girl who bullied me in junior high just friended me on Facebook. Her three kids are named after trees. I win.
@KelleysBreakRm: The reason I don't like Facebook's "memories" feature is because it shows me 6 years ago wearing the same shirt I have on right now.
@shujaxhaider: I want an app for each website I visit. And I want all of them to have loud videos that play automatically. This is my ideal user experience