@lisaOoOo: I hate when my friends stand so close to me when pictures are being taken. It's like they don't know I plan on cropping them out later.
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@BuckyIsotope: ME: *3D prints a girlfriend* Hey baby 3D Girlfriend: *3D prints a boyfriend* I have a boyfriend
@causticbob: In Russia, Vladimir Putin has said that the killers of Nemtsov "will be ruthlessly hunted down." He added, "It's cheaper than paying them"
@Home_Halfway: WIFE: I love you NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON: My experiences with you lead to an increase in dopamine and oxytocin as well
@ericsshadow: CNN: President Obama Saves The Life Of A Choking Child. FOX: Failed President Obama Tries To Take Jobs Away From Hard Working EMS Workers.