@NYC_Blonde: "I hate you but I love you. I miss you but you make me sick. You're wonderful but get away from me" -My love letter to carbs
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@trojansauce: *drinks milkshake* *runs to yard* *sifts through all the boys* *sighs* *puts up more posters for missing son*
@lovemydogduck: I'm so sick and tired of my friends who can't handle their alcohol. The other night they dropped me three time while carrying me to the car.
@_davidlucas_: Daddy! Tell me a story.. The Tooth Fairy is really a wicked witch, who takes all your teeth if you sleep with your mouth open. Good night.
@WilliamAder: I knew joining a gym was a bad idea when I got there and needed help pulling the door open.