@FuckabillyRex: I have a bad feeling I'll be wearing one of those barrels with suspenders by the end of the year, but not in a fun, whimsical way.
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@SinCityChiGirl: If Ben Affleck played Daredevil and Batman does that mean that he's blind as a bat? #WellThatsAGoodQuestion
@jergarl: Me: BABE HAVE YOU SEEN MY.. Wife: Fridge. M: Shoe? W: Fridge. M: How did you.. W:*reads note* Dear sober me, fridge. M:... W: Idiot.
@_SetTheHook_: Worst thing about having sex with a Canadian girl is having to sit through BOTH of our national anthems before we start.