@MountainDouche: I have a question for you guys. After the door bell rings, how long do I have to wait to turn the TV volume back up and make any movement?
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@MartaEffing: I laid my tired head down on my pillow & saw the most terrifying thing I could possibly imagine: My phone. On my dresser. Across the room.
@HeyZeus666: Sorry I said your baby looks like the anti-Christ. I meant to say she looks like her mother.
@TheTweetOfGod: It's not that he liked big butts; it's that he could not lie. THAT'S why Sir Mix-a-Lot deserved his knighthood.
@Mr_Kapowski: Lets not kid ourselves, if the zombie apocalypse broke out, there are a couple people we would swear were zombies so we could shoot them