@lecalabara: I have a very dry sense of humor. So I drink moisturizer.
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@patrickmarkryan: Radio Shack would have filed for bankruptcy years ago but they've been trying to do it using dial-up internet
@squirrel74wkgn: In my first job, I had to proofread tampon box instructions. Grammar was good, but it was clear that they had no idea how a period works.
@Reel2Dialog2: The Lion King is my favorite movie about how having a karate wielding monkey can completely change your life.
@fro_vo: [romantic walk] Me: *turns to date* darling Her: *gasps* Me: *gets down on one knee* will you Her: omg Me: protest racial inequality with me