@slimmy_shady: I have an idea for a website where people seeking to share their views and ideas can get together and ignore each other.
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@LackOfShame: Always get double toppings on take out pizza so you can eat one of the toppings off as an appetizer during your drive home.
@KarenKilgariff: LIFE HACK: If a public restroom is locked, violently yank the door handle over and over like a gorilla and never accept that it's occupied
@notalogin: First they came for the people who say "Awesome sauce," and I said nothing, because, frankly, those people deserve it.
@KatieBurnett: Your outfit says you work in an office, but your shoes say it might have a pole in it