@SmithWit: I have concluded that dryer lint is the cremated remains of all the missing socks.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ArfMeasures: DOCTOR: Well, I can't find anything wrong with you. I suspect the problem is heavy drinking ME: Should I come back when you've sobered up?
@wolfpupy: a good captain goes down with the ship, i personally don't need a professional obligation to sink to the bottom of the ocean, i just do it
@junejuly12: [In a meeting] Chad: You look tired this morning, Liz. Liz: *glares* Me: *whispers* nobody can help you now, Chad.
@gobmentcheese: I like to stand next to a stranger on the elevator and whisper, "I read what you said on the internet."