If bad ads/pop-ups are redirecting you, please take a screenshot and email it to [email protected]. Help us keep the site clean!
@krishna_van: I have many hidden talents. Just wish I could find 'em.
@TheMichaelRock: Superman: Who's gonna be Batman?
@4handfuls: Spending the weekend installing toothpaste-colored carpet since my 3 yr old insists on brushing his teeth while walking around the house...
@duplicitron: Let's turn this Pizza Hut into a pizza home.
@JohnPoveromo: The iWatch is awesome because it's the fastest way to let everyone know you used to have 500 dollars.
@KalvinMacleod: 911 what's the emergency?
"How do u unburn pizza?"
U burnt a pizza
I'll send a squad car
"Ok will they help?"
No ur under arrest