@MandiAtRandom: I have never in my life tried to pronounce an L so hard than when asking my dad for the "caulk"
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@hipchkk: The true irony in Taylor Swift singing about feeling 22 at age 23 is that I want to hit her in the face with a cast iron skillet.
@EndhooS: Boss "Are you high?" If I was high could I do this? *opens a tube of Pringles and eats only 1 of them*
@MarkAFuqua_Hunt: I'll always be here for you.... Unless we run out of beer, and someone has some over there. Then I'll be over there for you.
@AnOrangeSNES: On the periodic table, the elements are represented by two groups. The symbols and the atomic number. Law and Order: Atomic Mass Unit