@realDonaldTrump: I have never seen a thin person drinking Diet Coke.
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@abbycohenwl: Mama Bear: Ok but last time Papa Bear: Thanks, babe [she puts on a Goldilocks wig] Mama Bear (falsetto): I can't sleep here! It's toooo hard
@JermHimselfish: I love raking all the leaves in my yard into a big pile then running really fast and jumping to conclusions when people don't text me back.
@_Water_Baby: At the beginning of a long plane ride, I like to ask my husband why he loves me. His frantic look for an escape hatch entertains me.