@TheCatWhisprer: I have no idea how the cavemen could afford to eat paleo.
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@TwoSapphiresBlu: My kids are teenagers, and I've found the same thing fixes their bad moods as when they were toddlers: a snack and a nap.
@joejwest: I'm going to freeze some of my sperm so that if something goes wrong later in life, I can kill my nemesis with a disgusting icicle.
@Blondiethegood: I just threw away all the toilet paper in the office so this day is about to get interesting.