@melliemeow: I have on my new shoes today. They are so cute, and comfortable, as long as I don't stand in them or walk in them.
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@gerryhatric: My wife asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I winked at her. She bought me eye drops.
@dshack8: I'm weird but not "sit around the house with my shirt tucked in even though I've got no plans to leave" weird. That stuff's 4 serial killers.
@BlindChow: Mom: Time to wake updog. Son: *groggily* What's updog? Mom: Just waking you up for school, dog, what's up wit u? Dad (from hallway): OWNED