@tastefactory: I have such a bad cold that when I breathe through my nose, it sounds like Marge Simpson sighing/expressing disapproval.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@XplodingUnicorn: 5-year-old: I wish we all had infinity dollars Me: That’d wreck the economy 5: I just- Me: Go to your room until you understand inflation
@secondofhername: If you date someone working for the federal government and then break up, does he become FedEx? #oksorry