@SamuelHLowe: I have sychic powers. For example, right now you're thinking, "it's psychic."
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@existential_d: [salem] judge: we're burning you alive for being a w- her: a witch? judge: i was gonna say woman but holy shit that's a good excuse
@nbadag: [movie theater] TRAILER ANNOUNCER: how far will one man go.....to protect what he loves ME: [turning to person behind me] pretty far i bet
@SafyHallanFarah: if i was a character in a horror movie i would try to finish whatever i'm eating before i die
@geowizzacist: 3 (calls out): daddy I'm cleaning the floor with a mob. Me: you mean a mop? (enters to see 100 people licking the floor) no ok that's a mob