@juliussharpe: I have the Anne Hathaway "It came true!" reaction whenever the guy at Subway hands me my sandwich.
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@AmandaDuberman: Any woman with three or more exes in her city could have told Obama how to avoid Putin in Normandy.
@iamspacegirl: [answering door on halloween] NEIGHBORHOOD MOM: please stop giving the children hamsters ME *hands full of hamsters*: but it's Halloween
@LuckoftheDraw86: I'm gonna date the first guy to come out of this "Free STD Screenings!" van. #goodplan
@Ghetto_Trophy: I will punch you in the face. OK not really - but I will roll my eyes at you, hard.