@Crunch11b: I haven't been laid in so long that the Pope is laughing at me.
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@RichardDreyfuss: You read for a part, you feel good about it, you feel confident, then they cast Ben Affleck.
@WalkingOutside: I've never simultaneously loved something so much and wanted it to shut up as badly as I do with my kids.
@Breadery: Remember when you were small & all you wanted was a pony but your parents were high on meth & thought the house was already full of ponies?