@TheGoodGodAbove: I heard that #TheDress debate has already destroyed 18 relationships. These people probably shouldn't be breeding anyway.
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@apollilaire: i order a pizza online and under special requests i write: "tell me the meaning of life". when the door bell rings there's only an empty box
@gojarbe: *spills water on pants* ok don't let anyone think you peed your pants "hey what happ--" MY WATER BROKE, GET ME TO THE HOSPITAL