@NikiWithIssues: I hit a parked car today so naturally I left a note. It said "Die, Decepticons! Die!"
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@lawblob: Waldo books are cute until u learn he owes $100,000 in unpaid child support & is wanted for arson
@DannyZuker: "WAIT!" I screamed at my daughter as she typed Y-O-U on my computer but miraculously the autocomplete added "TUBE" so yeah, God exists.
@elynnbarlow: Apparently in yoga when the instructor says, 'next we go into our downward dog,' it is frowned upon to make the 'bowchickabowow' sound.