@_wendyb07: I hope I'm not the only one who hovers over someone when they use my favorite pen just so they know I'm serious about wanting it back.
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@ValeeGrrl: Capture a raccoon & an octopus. Sit them on the couch. Give them snacks. Sit between them. Turn on the TV. Now you're ready to have kids.
@LoveNLunchmeat: 80% of being Donald Trump is just worrying that the wind will blow your weird combover in the wrong direction.
@therealeatwood: [In this tweet spoons fall in love harder than anyone] “My darling I am a spoon for you, you fill my world with frogs” [and frogs are joy]