@jake_likes_naps: i hope jessica biel names her first child 'batmo"
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@iRowlf: It's pretty rude how they'll kick you out of the hospital just for using a defibrillator to make a grilled cheese sandwich.
@Advil: Netflix should double as a dating site and be like "here are 9 other singles in your area that watched LOST for the past 11 hours."
@GlennyRodge: "ENTER PASSWORD" *types 'snowflake'* "RE-ENTER PASSWORD" *types 'snowflake'* "ERROR. PASSWORDS MUST BE IDENTICAL".