@whereami18: I hope my kids love the gifts they receive for Christmas so I'll have more things to take away when I need to punish them
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@daemonic3: MILLION DOLLAR IDEA: An alarm clock that sounds like a dog's pre-puke warning grunts.
@RexHuppke: BREAKING: North Dakota lawmakers decide life begins at conception, and then begins again the moment you're old enough to leave North Dakota
@JohnnyCrash5: *Eats a Lean Cuisine *20 minutes go by. *Devours entire Pizza Hut store...including employees.