@NinjaFuneral: I hope this guy at the urinal next to me can see that I'm checking Twitter and not taking pictures.
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@Owl_Meat: [Next door dog barking] Me: *inserts earpugs* [Barking intensifies] Me: wtf................haha oh *removes earpugs and inserts earplugs*
@markleggett: At some point, male "pick-up artists" are just going to start chasing women around like Benny Hill.
@Freudianscript: Being popular on twitter is like being the keynote speaker at a Dementia Convention. No one remembers you the next day.