@Jackson5toLife: I hope you never have to experience the loss of a child. Lotta paperwork.
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@prodigalsam: Pretty cool to think every time the Verizon guy said "Can you hear me now?" the NSA was quietly answering "Yes we can."
@shariv67: The bright side of global warming is that 100% of our great grandchildren will own beachfront property.
@SteveSuckington: If you tell me I can only have sex with your sister over your dead body, your funeral is going to be awkward for some of your family.
@ramenfuneral: if i were a white vegan satanist i would constantly say stuff like "kale satan" and "i love the dark gourd" and nobody would stop me