@LeBearGirdle: I hugged someone else's mom at a park once and now mine won't pick me up bc I smell like other mom now
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@Dave_in_SoPo: Parenting is much harder nowadays. For example, you have to be able to push a kid on a swing and tweet at the same time.
@bouncerface: Everyone complains about immigration until they're searching the city for a decent taco.