@bourgeoisalien: I imagine one day my dearest friends will say at my funeral, "Wow. What an idiot. Who chokes to death on orange sherbet?"
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@daemonic3: HIM: Happy birthday, honey! I got you a gift basket, just like you wanted HER: Oh thanks! What's in it? HIM: What do you mean, "in it"?
@ScottLinnen: Wizard of Oz (1939) A hapless brain injured teen is led down the wrong path to heroin, cosplay, organ harvesting and ultimately homicide
@ChickenFrecklez: Rude coworker said something very dumb & mean to me. She blamed it on pregnancy brain. I asked her if she was having triplets.
@hipsterocracy: People shit on Columbus like they've never knocked on the wrong door and then murdered the people inside and lived there.