@glo_stevens: I just ate my yogurt with a fork, because I've learned that if it looks like you have your shit together, people ask you to do stuff.
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@itswrigley: I never did think of myself as beautiful, terribly attractive, yes, but not beautiful.
@JamieGreenlees: If Scientists invent a pill to make us immortal, I guarantee I'd choke to death swallowing it.
@McGrumpenstein: *Dial-up modem gets on stage at a whale rap battle* “BEEEEEWoooooo BLEEeeeeee BING bing ping” *drops mic* *stunned whale crowd loses it*
@praisecheese: "Archeology is just like search and rescue only everyone's been dead for 5,000 years, so there's no rush"