@labyrinthpretty: I just bought an answering machine! What should I ask it???
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@AudreyPorne: a horror film where the victim walks into her kitchen and everyone she's muted on twitter is standing there drinking coffee
@whatmaddness: I goofily dance over to my pals. Shit. These r strangers. Just… dance past them to my actual friends. Oh no. Help I need 2 find some1 I know
@shutupmikeginn: Lifehack: If whenever someone asks your opinion on something you say, "Now thats-a spicy meatball!" people will learn not to ask you things.