@stewnami: I just burped and fogged my glasses up. Line forms to the left ladies.
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@ZombieProblms: Do zombies go to heaven when they die? I hope so. There's lots of nice people up there to eat.
@KimmyMonte: [Jesus' dating profile] I love wine that's made from water, taking long walks on the ocean and going to supper w my friends.
@rockymomax: [pulled over] COP 1: any drugs or alcohol in the car? ME: no COP 2: told you he was a nerd ME: nuh uh I have so much drugs COP 1: lol gotcha
@SarahFemme: I hope at my funeral someone has the foresight to bring a Ouija board so I can live tweet Hell.