@kevnasto: I just called up the phone company and put em on hold. Every 5min i come on an tell them how important their business is to me. Please hold.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Contwixt: I have always been suspicious of Wendy's hamburgers because they are square; much unlike the round hamburgers one finds in nature.
@WilliamAder: Why hang Wanted posters in the post office? We're not crime-fighting crusaders. We're buying stamps.
@RoosterMustache: My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and they're like "hey thanks" and I'm like "I'm just happy to be a part of this nice community"
@OhNoSheTwitnt: Martin Shkreli has been arrested. Bail will be set, then quickly raised to an amount he can't possible afford.