@ReeseButCallMeV: I just cleaned out my purse. So, I'll be having a garage sale later this afternoon.
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@ceejoyner: Why don't you get back in your little car with lights and pull over someone who cares.
@_The_Man__: [in basement lab] wife: you cant just make your own honey me: (mouth dry, spitting pollen everywhere) I know that now Lisa.
@daemonic3: "Welcome, teachers & parents, to our community school assembly" *gestures to 237 IKEA boxes* "Let's begin! Who's got the Allen wrench?"
@causticbob: Why does Batman wear a mask? Because the citizens of Gotham aren't morons, like those idiots over in Metropolis.