@Nickadoo: "I just died in your arms" sounds much more romantic than "You're holding a dead body."
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@Thedudish: It's been so long since I bought groceries, this morning I saw a c**kroach move out. "Good luck," he sighed, clutching his tiny suitcases.
@dlockw21: In my experience, people who say "I'm not trying to be difficult," don't really seem to be trying all that hard.
@SirEviscerate: *tunnels out of prison cell, pops up in the warden's office in an entirely different prison* aw come ON