@Alex_N_Chains: I just felt a weird twitching somewhere inside me. I think it might be my liver waving a white flag.
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@TheMichaelRock: News: Don't panic about Ebola, but please watch this nonstop coverage about how it could spread everywhere and kill you. Don't panic though.
@BasicLyes: Impractical Joke: Replace my girlfriends house cat's with mountain lions so she think's she is shrinking.
@ShesARealGenius: [FIRST DATE] Me, opening mouth seductively: "And this is where I burned my tongue on pizza, and this is where I burned my tongue on fries, a