@13spencer: I just got cut off by a bald man in a BMW, so I pulled up next to him, rolled down my window, and laughed at him.
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@drayzze: 16: "What was the internet like in the old days?" Me: *opens door* *pushes 16 outside* *locks door*
@NervousJr: People who think only god can judge them have obviously never hung out with my friends.
@KrazykurtKurt: ME: "I don't want sex tonight" GIRLFRIEND: "ok" Reverse phycology doesn't work on women.
@hyperblastchic: Me: That was fun! Fist me! Him: What?! Me: Fist me!! *holds out knuckles* Him: .....