@the_mom_dot_com: I just got laid. But don't worry, I was totally thinking about you guys the whole time.
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@VanVeenB: Dance like nobody's watching you. 'Cause they're not. Nobody cares. ~Inspirational tweet~
@Laser_Cat: In space, no one can hear you scream. Because it's space, and everyone is on the ground. What are you even doing up there?
@jimelliott5000: Hey everyone, my mom's following me on Twitter now, so ixnay on all the eetstway about the ugsdray and exsay and acismray. Thanks