@Stella1070: I just had a moment of clarity. Glad that's over with.
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@LouisPeitzman: If you can't handle me at my fattest, then you sure as hell don't deserve me if I ever lose weight. Which could happen, you don't know.
@DirtMcTurd: One of the fake rooms at Ikea should just be a couple fighting as they try to put the furniture together
@fro_vo: Friend Who I Haven't Seen in a While: your kid's gotten so big! what is he, four? Me: i have no idea what he's for