@TheCatWhisprer: I just laid on my cat's keyboard while he was working on a last minute PowerPoint presentation.
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@PFTompkins: Never read the comments. Unless you're posting a comment. Then, read all the comments, because 40 other people already said that, genius.
@causticbob: There are 4 stages in life 1)You believe in Santa Claus 2)You don't believe in Santa Claus 3)You are Santa Claus 4)You look like Santa Claus
@KevinFarzad: College is expensive, BUT your student ID saves $3 at the movies. So really it pays for itself if you go to the theater 30,000 times.
@ComedicBust: [3:00am] Me: [spooning her] Baby, you up? Her: [playfully] Maaaaybe. Me: Cool. I heard a noise downstairs, can you go check it out?