@mactx85: I just now realized the guy at the urinal that complemented my watch might not have actually just been looking at my watch.
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@AbrasiveGhost: ME:[defending myself] Oh yeah?? Well I got 5 words for you buddy: please be nice to me
@Audenary: LINCOLN: Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and to remove all doubt. TWITTER: No.
@DaveWeasel: The words 'selfie' and 'twerk' have been added to the dictionary this year while 'charm' and 'dignity' have been removed.
@AudreyPorne: an attractive man on the internet called me pretty, so I sent him my finger nails in the mail. i'm so nervous lol what if he doesn't reply??