@shashaintl: I just owned you for three seconds. Possibly five if you're a slow reader. Up to ten if you read this again.
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@Tmoney68: Autocorrect changed "stranger" to "strangler" & it made me wonder how often I must have written about murdering people to teach it that.
@pleatedjeans: Crime tip: commit all your crimes in space NASA is not the space police there are no laws up there you will not go to jail
@BritXNic: "Alcohol doesn't affect me" *Wakes up with cornrows, a light saber and two taxidermy lizards*
@TheBoydP: [two coworkers walk into my office] Coworkers: Hey! It's your two favorite people here to ask you a question! Me: Where?