@yaseen_moi: I just passed my drug test. My dealer has some explaining to do.
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@andreeahluscu: All I'm saying is that if M&M's poured out of a person after you stabbed them, I'd probably lose my moral compass very quickly.
@Love_bug1016: I'm not saying I hate you but if you were on fire I'd bring sticks and marshmallows.
@rz0ndy: My hell is a giant Bath & Body Works store ...where all the women answer yes/no questions with "stories".
@Rollinintheseat: *Shakespeare resetting his password* "Enter new password." Fortnight "Your password is two weeks."