@lloydrang: I just ran 4.1 Kms and realized you can write anything you want after that and no one will read it purple monkey dishwasher.
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@dafloydsta: WIFE: You said you were going to put the dog down ME: *in tears* I TRIED BUT HE HAD SOME REALLY DEVASTATING COMEBACKS
@Lynseyjo1: To the girl with the nazi swastika avi that just rt'd me...... You just rt'd a Jew!!!! Enjoy your evening shalom
@Tmoney68: A man played Justin Bieber to force an attacking bear to run off. He was treated for his injuries, then arrested for cruelty to animals.
@ShutUpThatsWho: [first date] HER: What are you doing with the Tupperware? ME: [filling container] The sign says 'All You Can Eat', it doesn't specify when