@shutupmikeginn: I just ran into my high school bully and it was great cause I'm doing well and he's 17 which is very old for a dog
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@UncleDuke1969: Me: What do you think of my tweets? Wife: They're all pretty terrible. Me: Don't you have ANYTHING positive to say? Wife: You're consistent.
@Weird_Rash: Feeling pretty tough lately and thinking about joining a gang. Any of you guys need an accountant?
@NurseSeymour: I hear my ex is now into cross dressing & looking for same. At least that's what the Craigslist ad I just posted on his behalf says.