@LurkAtHomeMom: I just saved a bundle on future college tuition by finding out my 4 year old wants to be a gum ball when he grows up.
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@Papa_Mex: I've learned a lot about women. Ex: if you're going to the hospital for a gunshot wound & she asks for tampons, you'd better stop on the way
@Iam_Nathaniel: Girlfriend catches boyfriend cheating Boyfriend: WOOOW!!! So you gon believe your eyes over me?
@KeetPotato: [wife comes home from work] "why havent you done any of the things i asked you to" [the dog walks past dressed as a policeman] ive been busy