@jackiembouvier: I just saw a girl hang half her body out the window of her car to give someone the finger. She is my spirit animal.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@bradgage: ISIS frequently takes credit for random attacks even when they had nothing to do with them, making ISIS basically the Fat Jew of terrorism
@abhorrent_wife: Volunteer me to do something without checking with me first so I know whose mailbox to leave the dead squirrel in.
@Brentweets: "Fluffy died today" "Oh my god I'm so sorry, was he a cat or dog? "He was a boa constrictor" "Well that made me feel better"