@markydoodoo: I just saw a girl running without headphones and I feel I should call the police. She might be in trouble.
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@erikbransteen: Future Headline: “Trump Caught On Tape Eating Newborn Babies, Hillary Caught Using Friend's Netflix Password Undecideds Still On The Fence”
@BrownDogBlanket: I started an organization for the ethical treatment of plants. Because we shouldn't eat the things that make oxygen. Your move Vegans
@caliluvgirl77: I love when my friends start selling weight loss shakes because that's one less person I ever have to talk to again.