@RunJeffreyRun: I just saw a guy with the Monster energy logo tattooed on his neck, so if your village is missing their idiot, we have him.
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@splendidcynic: I don't really pay much attention to politics so basically what I'm asking is, does anyone know if it's still illegal to sell kids on eBay?
@HeyZeus666: I’d never snoop through my girlfriend’s phone out of love, a deep respect and the inability to crack her password.
@WilliamRodgers: 18 is TOO young to get married! You can't even buy booze at 18! If you can't buy booze, how the hell are you gonna make a marriage work?!?
@panmidwest: [business trip] ME: i forgot my charger COWORKER: you should invest in a spare to keep in your bag ME: i forgot all 4 of my chargers