@CJhooray: I just saw a list of candidates for the local Juvenile Judge election and I just don't think juveniles should even be able to be judges idk
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@TheBoydP: Protip: If you're walking in your office taking deep breaths because someone made popcorn, don't forget to stop as you enter the restroom.
@TheMichaelRock: Why did you have to take a half naked picture in front of a full length mirror to show off your new haircut?
@tastefactory: *bees surround guy* AHHH GET THEM AWAY "Don't make any sudden movements" *suddenly the Macarena comes on* Oh no...
@jctwritesstuff: [Date] Me: You're a scientist? Him: Yeah M: You like chemistry? H: M: Wanna get in my genes? H: M: *slow winks* H: Are you having a stroke?