@juliussharpe: I just saw an ad for a bulletproof briefcase. The real question is: why does your briefcase have so many enemies?
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@DaddyJew: The only problem with teaching little kids to share is that sometimes they want some of my stuff
@benmathaicomedy: 'Vegetarians' don't eat meat. 'Vegans' also don't eat eggs, milk or cheese. The final step is to just stand there +pretend to be a tree.
@daemonic3: Top uses for Golf Balls: 1. Describing hail storms 2. Describing tumors 3. Playing golf
@jimmytorosian: A lawyer walks into a bar. A lawyer leaves the bar. A lawyer walks into the bar. A lawyer fails the bar because he was drunk.